The Most Annoying Songs of Summer 2009 (Part I)

Every summer has a soundtrack, and, like most soundtracks, this summer's soundtrack sucks dick. Over the next three days, I'm going to count down the three worst songs of Summer 2K9 listed from least most annoying to most most annoying (Disregard the fact that the summer is only half over. I can only pray nothing more annoying is released before the end of August):

#3: "Don't Trust Me" by 3OH!3

First of all, you know this band is going to suck harder than an Argentinan whore at Mark Sandford's birthday party simply by their name. It's not 3O3 or even 3OH3 but 3Oh!3. God, that exclamation point is so punk rock! Retarded...

Second, do you see the picture of the woman on the right? Does she look like a woman who's going to start any kind of dance craze (It's Helen Keller by the way)? This is a woman who wasn't smart enough to see or hear. If she even attempted to dance, she would trip over a stool and snap her neck. Her last words would be, "Wah-wah!"

So please explain to me why a band would include the following lyrics in their song:

"Shush girl, shut your lips,
Do the Hellen Keller and talk with your hips."

What the fuck?! When I first heard this song, I honestly thought it was a joke song the radio had written. At the time I thought it was pretty funny. Then I found out it was a real song, and I was sad for Helen Keller. Hasn't the poor woman suffered enough without 3oh!3 including her in their shitty song? Since Helen Keller can't speak (mainly because she's dead), I will speak on her behalf: Fuck you, 3oh!3. I wish I was deaf. Then I wouldn't be forced to listen to your shittastic song on the radio at work. Although, I'm sure even signed, the song would suck dick.

Dumbed Down Version: WAH-WAH!